Alone on a desolate planet… completing it’s mission because that’s all it can do…  What a brave little toaster we have up there!

@MarsPhoenix: The Mars Reconnaissance Orbiter will monitor the encroaching ice cap from above, @BrianFinifter. I won’t see it (darkness will get me first)

I’m not really a regular blog reader.  There are a few people I like to stalk read from time to time either because they are authors whose books I enjoy or… well, that’s probably about it (aside from a couple of friends who don’t really update their blogs).  There are other people I follow on twitter who don’t blog that often and I’m not sure I’d even read their blogs if they did, but I enjoy the odd thoughts that come out of their heads.

Then there’s The Bloggess.  I follow her religiously on twitter, her blog and Good Mom/Bad Mom on the Houston Chronicle.  I can’t really describe her to you and still get you to read her.  She’s something you have to experience first hand.  All I can really say is that she makes me feel like the thoughts in my head are ok… Here are a few you should start out with:

• I bet 700 years in the future they don’t even know what a “fail whale” is
• “Thanks for the zombies, Jesus!“
• I’m fine. (Updated - No, I’m not.)
• Puerto Rico, part one: Things I learned in first class
• On Meeting Guy Kawasaki (he’s kind of a big thing for innerweb geeks):
  • This just in. Guy Kawasaki did not invent the motorcycle.
  • I should totally introduce people for a living.
  • Disclaimer: this post is not really about being naked with donkeys

If you’re offended by any of these… well, hi, I don’t think you know me…

In past lives, I’ve been accused of falling into “dark moods”. It wasn’t about the glass being half full, but more screaming out “who gave me such a big fucking glass?!?” What did people think I need such a big glass for? What the hell am I ’sposed to put in there? Someone will just come along and piss in it because that’s what people do… they get shit-faced and then need a place to piss and here will be my big fucking glass and they’ll say “hey, here’s a big glass that’s only half full… there’s plenty of room for me to piss in it… woohoo, my lucky night… I’ll take a piss and then get back to this party and score with that hot chick I’ve been hitting on!” and then what will I have? A big fucking glass full of piss and then I’ll have to smile about it… It’s not like I can complain cuz my glass is NO LONGER FUCKING HALF FULL! People will tell me, sure, it’s got piss in it, but it’s only HALF FULL OF PISS… look on the bright side! So, I’ll smile and not let on that someone pissed in my big fucking glass! Then I’ll just be this ass walking around with a big fucking glass full of piss slopping all over my hands with a stupid ass grin on my face while some other guy gets lucky with the sloppy drunk co-ed. SCREW ‘EM! TAKE YOUR GLASS AND YOUR PISS AND GO TO HELL!

um… heh… well… like I was saying… that was in past lives… I’ve moved on. Let the anger go, if you will. Fill my glass up, brother… it just keeps getting bigger! But, the point is, The Bloggess, my favorite blog authoress, passed on a tweet to everyone with the following song.  It reminded me of the good ole days of anger, depression, self-loathing, denial, frustration, hate, despair… um… yeah, the good ole days.  So, I wanted to share it with both all of you.  I leave you with this on a Friday, to top off your week.  Life could be worse, your attitude affects everyone around you, so grin that big dopey grin and try not to spill any piss on your hands!

Great… as if the two armed snake isn’t bad enough… now they are reporting that an octopus really has 6 arms and 2 legs… LEGS! How long do you think an octopus can hold it’s breath? What if the “armed” snakes team up with the “legged” octopi? With Bigfoot rumoured dead, we can only hope the chupacabra defense league can defend us. Just need to make sure the Texas rangers don’t stop them.

All morning, I had “Ebony and Ivory” (original, not SNL) in my head.  Nothing could get it out.  I even tried supplant it with “Islands in the Stream” but to no avail.  Then I ran into the following video.  I warn you, this is not for small children.

Edgar Oliver, the son of a recluse and a morphine addict, and his three cats… This guy may be the last of the old-school bohemians, but he disturbs me like no one has in a great while.  His mannerisms, enunciation, and the simple look in his eyes cause a real physical reaction in me that I can’t describe other than it’s not pleasant.  He’s from Georgia but lives in NYC-area.  Perhaps he’s brilliant, but if that’s brilliant, sign me up for the short-bus.